Did i say i was cured? I doubt it. Even when i say i was, somehow that demon manage to creep back into your life and scare the heck outta you. That’s when you realise that you need more than a miracle to save yourself.
I have been through some difficult times while i was away from Friendster. I guess it’s not just the family and friends, it’s about me. The demon, the ghost, the spirit that dwells in me. Those negative thoughts that have been haunting me. I turned down the Wrigley’s contract after i had my seizure attack in the LRT train. After that incident, felt everything crushed down to pieces. The courage i once had, to venture forth into a world of uncertainties, all fizzled away. In the hospital, all i could think of is, is this the end? No more work? What will i do? As usual no one came to check me out and i was all alone in the hospital. Few days later, i decided to quit the Wrigley’s contract. Either because i don’t wanna get my health involved, or because i’m chicken. Those uncertainties playing in my mind all the while. Telling me that i’m not worth it. I can’t go on another inch. I’m worthless. Whatever i do sucks. Can’t even complete my own comic, my own epic. Life’s just get suckier day by day.
Looking thru those days i went thru, i had a slight depression in me. Have i not achieved what i have dreamed for? Did i actually get what i want? The answer, is no. And i am still depressed.
Depressed because of who i am.
I nearly gave up. Give up my career. My arts. My love for comics.
Then someone came up to me and showed me the way.
It’s hard to fight it, but it’s all i’ve got. And i will fight the demons no matter how tough it gets.
Look out, world. I may be weak, but i’m not weak at heart.
